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TITLE: “The End”
WRITTEN BY: Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof
AIR DATE: May 23rd 2010

I was going to write a review of the series finale as soon as I’d finished watching it but when it was over I found myself going over everything in my head.  After that I went online and had a look at some of the reactions.  Needless to say they were at both ends of the spectrum.  Some were calling it the worst thing ever and that it made six years of the show worthless, which in itself is a ridiculous notion, and other were proclaiming it the best episode of TV ever.  Hell, E! just named Lost the best show of the last 20 years, which I have a feeling the finale played a strong part in.  After reading all this and with everyone weighing in on the finale I kinda lost interest in having my say.  However, my friend Crystal just called me and voiced her disappointment that I hadn’t given my opinion on the end of the show.  With her in mind here are my thoughts on the end of one of the best shows ever.

First off, I don’t buy Darlton’s claim that Lost has always been about the characters.  That may have been the writers intent all along but a healthy dose of fans followed the show for the mythology first and the characters second.  This season was certainly more focused on the characters with the mythology episodes seemingly used to answer questions raised in previous seasons, and I think now that the sideways world has been revealed as some sort of purgatory that side of the story also plays strongly towards the character side of things.  Being an atheist I wasn’t particularly happy with the idea that now all the characters had awakened they could all go on to heaven together, but I can appreciate what the show was going for.  When all the characters started to get together at the church I was sure it was the same church with the lamppost station that Eloise Hawking used to send the Oceanic 6 back to The Island.  I figured they were all going to go back and live happily ever after.  Guess I was wrong.

Lost has from the very beginning been able to introduce new characters and make them feel like a part of this universe.  They’ve never felt like addons or third wheels.  That’s a testament to the writers and the amazing actors.  Chief among all the new additions to the show was Michael Emerson (Benjamin Linus).  My understanding was that the character was written for a two or three episode arc but Emerson impressed everyone so much that he was written into the show fulltime.  I loved Ben’s apology to Locke outside the church, and him commending Hurley on being a great #1 and I really feel like Ben found peace with everything he’d done.  It was also great that Locke forgave Ben.  That short scene between the two was absolutely fantastic.

Aside from the skillful writing and the mystery surrounding The Island, Lost was a success because of the stellar acting of everyone involved.  I’ve harboured a grudge against Heroes since the show came on the air because fanboys insisted that it was a better show than Lost.  I’d like to think that the 1st season finale of Heroes and the 3rd season finale of Lost which aired a few days later proved conclusively that Heroes wasn’t worthy to like the shit off Lost’s shoes but if you need further proof you should look to the quality of acting on the two shows.  One of the many reason why Heroes was so God-awful was the absolutely terrible acting.  Lost never suffered from this problem and this is one of the reasons why so many new characters could be introduced and all be embraced by the audience.  Just off the top of my head after the 1st season the show was able to introduce Ben, Juliet, Mr Eko, Anna Lucia, Libby, Desmond, Penny, Charles Widmore, Eloise Hawking, Charlotte, Lapidus, Miles, Daniel, Richard, Jacob, the MiB, and probably more that I’m forgetting.  All of these characters were superb additions and each actor portraying them did an outstanding job.

Despite my misgivings about whether or not Lost has always been about the characters I have to admit that this was a very moving episode.  I haven’t cried once during the entire run of Lost, even when episodes are structured to bring about those kinds of reactions (like the one where Sun and Jin died), however I couldn’t help but tear up during some of the awakenings.  Of particular note was the whole Kate/Claire/Charlie scene.  I’ve never been a big fan of Charlie, he was always kind of a whiner, but for some reason that whole scene really got to me.  However, my favourite awakening was the Sawyer/Juliet one.  Those two were so great together and that scene was played brilliantly.  I always liked the chemistry between Sawyer and Kate but it was more of a lustful relationship than one of love.  Juliet and Sawyer loved each other.  Whilst we may not have seen their relationship develop they effectively spent 3 or so years together living with the Dharma Initiative.  They belonged together and I was extremely happy when it was those two who awakened each other and not Sawyer and Kate.

I was happy that the episode was able to mix in a healthy chunk of action along with the drama.  Jack facing off with Not-Locke was pretty cool and has been something that’s been building from the 1st season.  I know that Not-Locke isn’t the original and that Jack’s come around to Locke’s way of thinking about The Island (he even says that Locke was right about everything and that Not-Locke is just wearing Locke’s face) but it was still nice to see those two faces going at it on the edge of the cliff.  Not-Locke stabbed Jack fucking good.  And after six seasons of Kate following after people I shouldn’t have been surprised that she turned up to shoot Not-Locke yet I was.

Finally, I’d like to briefly mention what a pleasant surprise it was to see Boone and Shannon return.  Like Charlie I was never a very big fan of these two but I thought their inclusion was a further nod to the show and the characters returning the their 1st season origins.  It never actually occurred to me that Shannon would be the one to awaken Sayid.  I figured Nadia was his one true love and when he didn’t get together with her that he’d be awakened in some other fashion.  And again, it was a touching flashback montage of their memories.  It was also great to see Rose and Bernard on The Island.  I’d forgotten about them completely.

When Jack became the protector of The Island last week I can’t say I was surprised.  Jack has been the lead character since the very first episode so it stands to reason that he’d be the one to take over for Jacob.  I know my friend Crystal would have been disappointed with that development because she hates Jack and wanted Hurley to be the one to take over.  I know she’ll be happy that Hurley ended up being the protector of The Island.  I also really liked the conversation between Hurley and Ben after Hurley took over.  That desperate need of Ben to be important was validated by Hurley asking him for help.  It’s something that Ben hasn’t really experienced in a number of seasons, that someone actually needs and wants him, and it’s fitting that Hurley, probably the purest Lostie, would be the one to show Ben that he’s needed.  And that his need is in requirement of The Island only makes Hurley’s request more significant for Ben.

After last week’s episode there was ridiculous talk about Lost jumping the shark and that people weren’t going to watch it anymore.  Just craziness.  But that’s the type of devotion fans have for the show.  Me on the other hand, I like to just role with whatever the show throws my way.  I haven’t bothered to try and formulate a theory about what The Island is or why they were all brought there, so when that stuff is actually revealed I have the luxury of not being disappointed that my theory was wrong or second guessing the decisions of the writers.  I think my approach to watching Lost is one that lead to me enjoying the conclusion of the show more than those who’ve invested a lot of time into developing a theory of everything that’s taken place simply because I have no preconceived notion of how I think the show should/would end.

More idiocy followed the finale with people saying it ruined the previous six years.  I’m positive that anyone who feels this way doesn’t have the intelligence necessary to follow a simple conversation between Jack and Christian.  Below is a transcript of everything that was said between the two in the church:

Christian: Everything that’s ever happened to you is real.  All those people in the church, they’re all real too.

Jack: They’re all… they’re all dead?

Christian: Everyone dies sometime kiddo.  Some of them before you, some  long after you.

Jack: But why are they all here now?

Christian: Well there is no now here.

Jack: Where are we dad?

Christian: Well this is a place that you all made together so that you could find one another.  The most important part of your life was the time that you spent with these people.  That’s why all of you are here.  Nobody does it alone Jack.  You needed all of them and they needed you.

Jack: For what?

Christian: To remember… and to let go.

Jack: Kate, she said we were leaving.

Christian: Not leaving.  No.  Moving on.

Jack: Where are we going?

Christian: Let’s go find out.

Retards the world over are saying that the finale made the entire series a waste of time, presumably because they think the castaways were dead the entire time.  It’s precisely because there are morons in the world who can’t follow a simple conversation that networks feel the need to make simple mindnumbingly shit shows like The Big Bang Theory.  A look at what was actually said between Jack and Christian shows that this is simply not the case.  Everyone was real.  They crashed on The Island.  They lived there for a time and clashed with The Others, the smoke monster and the freighter guys.  It all really happened.  The finale provided a bookend to show that that time on The Island was the most important time of those people’s lives.

As for complaints I would have liked a little bit more mythology in the episode but I guess the whole water thing and that underground cave can be debated over by fanboys until they’re blue in the face.  I’m also not sure what happened to Desmond.  Did he live or die after going into the cave?  For a guy who was so important to The Island his ending was a little ambiguous.  In addition, the one mystery which still has me wanting an answer is “the rules” between Ben and Widmore and why Ben had said he couldn’t kill him yet he did.  That seems like something which is pretty important and is probably the one remaining question I’d like answered the most.

RATING: 9/10

CONCLUSION
I thought it was suitably epic, sad, heartwarming and poetic.  A finale perfectly in tone with what the series has always been.

Written by: Chad St John
To be directed by: Timur Bekmambetov
To star: Robert Downey Jr and Reese Witherspoon

Aliens are destroying our planet by going back in time.  They travel back each day to destroy each yesterday.  One man, James Smith (Downey Jr), beats them to a yesterday to warn people of impending disaster.

Talk about a nonstop action flick.  The action in this one starts from the 2nd page and doesn’t let up for another 109 pages.  This is nothing but pure action which will be infused with the charm of Robert Downey Jr and Reese Witherspoon and with Timur Bekmambetov’s visual flare as an added bonus.

There’s probably no-one hotter in Hollywood right now than Robert Downey Jr and it’s surprising that it took the success of Iron Man for the industry (and the public) to realise just how fantastic he is.  The guy’s 100% pure charisma isn’t he?  Show me someone who doesn’t like Downey and I’ll show you an idiot.

Reese Witherspoon is equally as charming as Downey but packaged in a different way.  I actually like Reese Witherspoon, not her tired romantic comedy roles, but the few things she’s done outside of that typically shitty genre.  She was great in Freeway and Election.  Reading the script it was exceptionally easy to picture her in the role of Riley with everything Riley says sounding like it could come from Witherspoon and her sexy as hell accent.

The dialogue and banter between Riley and Smith is pretty natural save for a few instances and I’m hard pressed to think of two actors who’d be better in these roles than Downey and Witherspoon.  Now it may be that because I had these actors in mind before I started reading the script that I somehow projected their suitability onto the characters, but the casting seems pretty spot on to me.

As for the actual aliens the jury’s still out.  From what’s in the script I pictured them as the velociraptors from Jurassic Park covered in armour, carrying futuristic assault rifles, and with a Blackberry on their hip.  Kinda like a douchebag dinosaur.  There’s something equally terrifying and comical about that image.  Depending how they’re done and the combination of live action and CGI they could be halfway decent or absolutely terrible.  I certainly wasn’t that fearful of them the way they were described in the script though.

On an end note I’d like to say that I really disliked the very last action line which has the Blackberry device powering on, indicating that the alien ships are near.  Every time I encounter something like this in a script or film it drives me fucking crazy.  Kinda like the shitty ending in the Eagle Eye script where the PS3 says hello to the kid as some indication that the supercomputer AI is still around.  Those kind of tags bug the living hell out of me.  Just end the fucking story already.  It’s one step above winking at the audience.  There’s nothing wrong with the film ending with a sense of closure.  Hopefully when The Days Before is released that final shot of the Blackberry in the trash won’t make the cut.

RATING: 6/10

CONCLUSION
It’s a very cool concept to be going back in time day by day to prevent aliens from destroying the world but I just wasn’t a fan of the aliens being repilian.  Dinosaurs take over the world with assault rifles and Blackberrys. Ugh.  I think the imagery of New York being ripped apart will be a major factor in how the film turns out, just as the visual effects for the reptile aliens will be.  I have the utmost faith in Downey Jr, Witherspoon and Bekmambetov so if the visual effects are up to scratch I think the film could turn out to be a fairly enjoyable popcorn flick, but that’s all it’s gonna be.

Written by: Mark Millar, Jane Goldman and Matthew Vaughn
Directed by: Matthew Vaughn
Genre: Superhero, action, comedy, drama, crime

I’ve been working on this review for a day or two now, trying not to get it online too quickly and have it rushed.  Usually after I see a new film and decide to write a review I’ve only been out of the cinema for an hour at most before it’s written and posted.  That pretty much always results in a poor effort where I don’t explain myself or the film very well and I either gush or complain without any clear thoughts.  I wanted to make sure that my review of Kick-Ass was better because the film deserves better.

It’s also worth noting that I was in a screening with four kids (10 and under) and a mother who wouldn’t shut them up.  I was distracted by them the entire film and I still enjoyed the hell out of Kick-Ass.  If anything illustrates how good a film it is that does.  And by the way, what kind of irresponsible parent takes a 10-year-old kid to see Kick-Ass?  What makes things worse is she wasn’t the only one.  There were a bunch of parents with young kids at my screening.  I’m talking in the 7-10 range.  Who can possibly think that’s alright?  And even if they were genuinely mistaken about the tone of the film (even though here in Oz it’s rated MA15+ meaning anyone under 15 has to be with a guardian), the language starts up almost immediately.  If you’re any kind of responsible adult you take your kids and leave.  You don’t stick around and let your kids listen to 2 hours of f-bombs, motherfuckers, and cunts.  God damn that kind of parenting really pisses me off.

Anyway, onto the film.

As most will know it’s about a guy, Dave, who one day decides to put on a costume and become a superhero.  Along the way he discovers that he’s not the only regular Joe who does this.  His actions lead him to draw the attention of bad ass mob boss Frank D’Amico.

I’ll get this out of the way early, Kick-Ass is bloody amazing.  It’s just about the most perfectly constructed and paced superhero deconstruction flick you could possibly ask for that not only breaks down the superhero genre but somehow manages to turn into a full-fledged superhero movie itself about 2/3rds through.  It’s easily the #1 movie I’ve seen in 2010 and is almost certain to be in the top 3 by the end of they year.  That being said, every review of the film (and mine is no different) will focus on the jawdropping performance of Chloe Moretz as Hit Girl.  I’ve been a fan of Moretz since I first saw her in an episode of My Name Is Earl.  Now that was always an average show but she elevated her particular episode way above anything else that show accomplished, and I remember watching it and just being amazed at how effortlessly charming she was.  This is an 8-year-old girl I’m talking about.  Needless to say, when I found out she was cast as Hit Girl I was pretty damn happy.  Everyone is strong in the film but Moretz is gonna be the clear favourite amongst viewers.  The action and fight scenes, the language, the attitude and the acting all combine to make her the star of the film.  There’s no two ways about it.  The good things I’ve heard about the screenplay Mixtape and the rumour that Moretz will be cast in the lead only have me more excited about the amount of work she’s getting.  I haven’t been this excited about the talent of a young actor/actress since I saw Dakota Fanning in Man on Fire.

Right up there with Chloe Moretz is Nicolas Cage, a guy who’s been very hit or miss in recent years.  Despite the amazing Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans (which was seemingly tailor written with his manic performance in mind) he hasn’t done anything particularly noteworthy in years.  That all changes with Kick-Ass.  His awkward humour “He should call himself Ass Kick”, the delivery of his lines, and that amazing fight scene where he takes apart all the gangsters by himself.  Wow man, he may never have been better.  Add to all that some great chemistry between him and Moretz and the fact that his performance is for once not too manic, and he clearly shines.  It’s just a shame that he won’t be reprising the role in the almost certain sequel.

As for the bad guy, after his performance in Sherlock Holmes, Mark Strong once again does an exceptional job as the guy you love to hate.  His whole demeanor is powerful and menacing, and I couldn’t help but cheer a little when he got out of his car after seeing Kick-Ass and delivers one almighty roundhouse to back of the guys head.  And when he shot the witness to the attack in the back when he tried to run away a little smile crept across my face.  The ability to be intimidating and authoritative but also funny and charming isn’t any easy thing to do, but Mark Strong does it comfortably.  There’s no doubt that Mark Strong is gonna become the go-to actor for portraying bad guys.

Not to be forgotten in all this is Christopher Mintz-Plasse who proves that he’s not just a one hit wonder with Superbad.  Here he plays the son of a mob boss who wants to take part in the family business.  He’s not a good guy.  And it’s amazing how completely you forget that he’s McLovin’ when you see him in Kick-Ass.  Mintz-Plasse is a guy I thought was forever gonna be McLovin’, just like Seann William Scott will always be Stifler, but I seriously never even though of Superbad the entire time I was watching Kick-Ass.  Not once.  That’s how good Mintz-Plasse was as Chris D’Amico/Red Mist.  He was funny, cool and ever so slightly unhinged and I have to admit, way way better than I thought he would be.

In all my raving about Moretz, Cage, Strong and Mintz-Plasse you might think I’ve forgotten about the lead guy, Aaron Johnson, but that’s only because of the amazing performances of those already mentioned.  Aaron Johnson is an unknown to me.  I’ve never seen him in anything, even though I’m kinda interested in seeing Nowhere Boy, but like everyone else in Kick-Ass he does an outstanding job.  Mixing some great teen angst with comedy, action, emotion and attitude he’s great as the title character.  What’s more, his character really develops as the film progresses and he evolves into a much stronger person because of everything he goes through.  You can really see Dave’s confidence grow throughout the film, especially after he outs himself to Katie.  I have to say that his performance didn’t knock me out because I didn’t know what to expect from him or the character.  He really just comes across as an average teenage guy and I don’t think there could be a bigger compliment for Johnson than that.  I mean, that’s who he’s playing, an average guy who one day decides to put on a costume and fight crime.  He made me believe he was that guy completely and he did an impressive job doing it.

As for the fringe players, Lyndsy Fonseca, Clark Duke and Evan Peters are also all superb.  Duke and Peters playing Dave’s friends provide great comic relief, I mean REALLY GREAT comic relief, but it never seems forced or out of place like the filmmakers are trying to break the tension.  It’s just two guys busting the balls of a friend, ragging on him because the girl he likes thinks he’s gay, or that he got his ass kicked and now they can hit him with shit and he doesn’t feel it.  It’s the kind of stuff that any one of us would do to our friends.  It doesn’t happen too often in films that the designated comic relief is not only seriously funny but also true to life, but like everyone else involved with Kick-Ass, Clark Duke and Evan Peters do a truly fantastic job in their roles and it’s another reason why Kick-Ass is so damn great.

Last but not least is the love interest in the whole affair, Katie, played by Lyndsy Fonseca.  My only exposure to Fonseca has been through her tiny role as one of Ted’s kids on How I Met Your Mother, hardly a role that could give me any indication of her talent, but like everyone I’ve already mentioned she seems to be perfect in her role.  She’s obviously smoking hot, but she was also pretty funny on occasion, and very good in that emotional scene when she’s watching Kick-Ass getting beaten.  Her character also provides the opportunity for Dave to meet Hit Girl and Big Daddy and it’s this course of action which sets the major events of the film into motion.  And just like Dave, Katie evolves throughout the film thanks to her developing relationship with Dave.  It’s all very well done and completely genuine.  Especially when Dave admits everything to her in her bedroom.  That was a beautifully constructed and acted scene.

Now that I’ve gone over all the major players in the film it’s worth noting just how fantastic the soundtrack throughout the whole thing is.  I was constantly struck by the great use of music during Kick-Ass and when there isn’t the most perfect song blaring over the action there are other methods used to suck you in.  Like when the lights go out during the execution scene and there’s this rhythmic pounding of bass as the tension builds.  It’s little things like that which really add to the awesomeness of Kick-Ass.  Stuff that could never (or should never) be in a script but which a talented director will implement to make the viewing experience so much more rewarding.  And Kick-Ass is rewarding.  It plays to all our desires.  It’s equal parts funny, violent, charming, endearing, emotional and genuine, and it’s absolutely not to be missed.

RATING: 10/10

CONCLUSION
I was gonna give Kick-Ass 9.5/10 simply to allow room for improvement in the almost inevitable sequel but when I actually thought about it I couldn’t come up with any areas which could be improved.  That’s how good it is.  To say that a movie geek like me couldn’t come up with anything to be improved is probably the strongest indicator of how truly stupendous Kick-Ass is.

Written by: Diablo Cody
Genre: Drama

Mavis, a 30-something writer of young adult fiction who’s struggling to finish the final book in the long running series, goes back to her old home town in order to win the affection of her high school sweetheart Buddy.

When speaking to Vulture a few weeks ago, Diablo Cody had this to say about Young Adult:

It has elements of humor, but it’s pretty serious and fucked up. You don’t get to see women be antiheroes that often, where it’s like somebody like Mickey Rourke, who gets a comeback in The Wrestler. It’s rarer that you’ll have a studio say, “Let’s have an actress come back and be ugly!

After reading the screenplay I dare say she’s pretty spot on with her analysis.  It was actually pretty weird reading the script and having the protagonist/lead be so completely mean spirited, cruel and unlikeable.  I have no idea who they’d get to play Mavis but no-one’s gonna like her, not even at the end of the film because she never has that moment where she resolves to set her life in order.  She just pity fucks a cripple, makes small talk with his sister, and drives off back to the city whilst daydreaming about her high school sweetheart Buddy like the events of the film never took place.

I don’t know if I’d say the script was bad, it just wasn’t particularly good either.  Not much happens during the whole thing other than Mavis becoming an even bigger bitch, a few revelations come about, and Buddy and Beth come off as saints.  The success of the film will probably hinge on who they cast in the major roles of Mavis, Matt, Buddy and Beth.  One thing’s for certain though, this is not gonna be a film anything like Juno or Jennifer’s Body, because both of those had leads who you rooted for/liked despite either being a bratty know-it-all kid (Juno), a wide eyed nerd (Needy) or demon possessed hot chick (Jennifer).  The major characters in Young Adult are the previously mentioned mean spirited, cruel and unlikeable Mavis, the sometimes equally mean and bitter Matt, and the husband and wife Buddy and Beth whose actions are motivated by pity for Mavis and Matt.

I know a great deal of people don’t like Diablo Cody but I really enjoyed Juno and Jennifer’s Body, and I was genuinely excited to read Young Adult (hell, I broke away from reading Michael Connelly’s Angels Flight to read the whole thing just now) but I came away from it sorely disappointed.  I had no idea what it was gonna be about but I certainly expected more from it than what I ended up getting.  Those that do hate Diablo Cody, and her unique dialogue in particular, will be pleased to know that there is none of that verbal wackiness that infected both Juno and Jennifer’s Body.  Young Adult does not contain any nonsensical language.  But seen as how Young Adult is so decidedly average maybe Diablo Cody’s peculiar use of words is what translates to a good story.

RATING: 5.5/10

CONCLUSION
I hate to do it, being such a big fan of Diablo Cody and all, but the script just wasn’t that good.  My excitement was for nothing.  Read Young Adult if you want to see how to write a completely miserable, unlikeable, selfish, cruel, liar bitch.  Otherwise don’t waste your time.  Young Adult certainly isn’t enough to turn me off Diablo Cody but I’m going to try and be a little bit more subdued in my excitement the next time I get a chance to read new material of hers.

Written by: Jon Favreau, Vince Vaughn and Dana Fox
Directed by: Peter Billingsley
Genre: Comedy

Yeah, I know I’m well behind the ball in reviewing Couples Retreat but I only just saw it and am in need of content for my little blog, and to be honest, when I first heard about this sometime last year I was super excited because it stars so many of my favourite actors and actresses.  Look at this list:

Vince Vaughn
Jason Bateman
Jon Favreau
Kristen Bell
Malin Akerman
Kristin Davis
Ken Jeong
John Michael Higgins

That’s one super-impressive list of hot and funny people.  Despite the low review scores I was still left to wonder how this film could possibly fail.

Because it’s an unfunny piece of shit that says nothing and goes nowhere, that’s how.

I’m kind of at a loss to put into words how totally average and unfunny the film is.  I seriously don’t think I laughed once during the entire thing.  The one guy I thought would shine despite the movie getting terrible reviews was Jason Bateman who you can always depend upon to bring the laughs with his understated dry delivery.  But no, not even Michael Bluth himself ended up being funny.  Instead he was probably the most annoying, insufferable person in the movie, easily trumping Jean Reno and his new age hippie routine.  Every single person in Couples Retreat sank to a new low and yet I continued to watch for the chance to see some more bare flesh from the ladies.

After it became obvious within the first 15 minutes that the movie was painfully unfunny I stuck around simply for the chance to see the three beautiful ladies in either their underwear or bikinis.  And it’s in that regard only that the movie can be called a success.  The scene in the banner pic is hands down the best thing about the film and is the only reason I can see to give it even an average score.  The sad truth is that Jon Favreau, Vince Vaughn and Dana Fox cannot write good comedy.  Favreau and Vaughn may be great in some of their previous roles, but good comedic acting does not translate to good comedic writing.

RATING: 5/10

CONCLUSION
Watch it for the stunning Kristen Bell, Malin Akerman and Kristin Davis standing on the beach in their underwear.  Better yet, search Google Images for screencaps from the scene and save yourself from 113 minutes of completely unfunny shit.

Written by: Dennis Lehane (novel) and Laeta Kalogridis
Directed by: Martin Scorsese
Genre: Thriller, mystery, drama

My two weeks of legal training workshops, exams and hearings are now over so I have just a little time to sit down and actually do something for my site.  If there’s anyone out there that does visit my site and is still checking in (considering I haven’t updated in weeks) I really will try and post more stuff now that the intensive part of my training seems to be over.

Anyway, I managed to find some spare time last week and I finally got to see Shutter Island.  I was looking forward to it last year when I first saw the trailer and that anticipation didn’t die down even after it’s release date was shifted back.  Leonardo DiCaprio has reached that point in his career where I’ll watch just about anything he stars in, hell, I even sat through almost an hour of Revolutionary Road.  That’s how much I like him.

So as for the movie it was pretty damn awesome up until the twist…
SPOILER WARNING

5

4

3

2

1

Leo’s the patient.

I feel like 10 years ago this might have been a cool twist that left me awestruck and impressed, but now it just seems so tired.  I felt completely cheated by the whole thing in the end and I wouldn’t have thought that Scorsese or DiCaprio would have attached themselves to something so by the numbers.  It’s almost like that episode of Dallas where J.R. is shot but it’s all just a dream.

In my opinion I think the movie would have been far better if DiCaprio was just an FBI guy who is lured to the island in an effort to trap him and he has to solve the crime and escape.  And for the majority of the film that’s exactly what it is until it veers off into M. Night Shyamalan territory.  The trailer is far superior because the whole thing is based around the idea that DiCaprio goes to the island to solve a crime and is trapped there against his will.  There’s nothing in it that makes you think any different.

As you’d expect with a Scorsese flick all the performances were sublime, as was the cinematography and score, and for 90% of the film it was just about the perfect crime/mystery/thriller.  But that damn twist went and ruined everything.  All in all I was quite disappointed in Shutter Island because I was hoping for another knockout from Scorsese and DiCaprio who’ve been on a very impressive roll together.  I guess I’ll have to get my quality fix from DiCaprio from the upcoming Inception, which I have no doubt will be one of my favourite films of the year.

RATING: 6.5/10

CONCLUSION
I’ve spent about 400 words saying it, but the film would have been so much better without the twist.

Title: “Epitaph Two: Return”
Written by: Maurissa Tancharoen Whedon, Jed Whedon & Andrew Chambliss
Air Date: 29th January 2009

Here it is, the final episode of Dollhouse ever.  It’s not as monumental an event as it will be when Lost airs it’s final episode sometime in April, but for fans of Eliza Dushku’s and Joss Whedon’s action sci-fi drama it’s something of note.  I’m not what you’d call a true diehard fan of Whedon or Dushku.  I don’t think Firefly is as good as it’s become in the eyes of many, and I’m still not convinced of Dushku’s acting chops, but I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt simply because of my undying love for Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Buffy is the only reason I sat through the first half of Dollhouse’s first season, having faith that Whedon had a plan and would soon begin executing it.  That plan began to form around episode six “Man on the Street” and from that point on Dollhouse improved exponentially.

This season has been great from start to finish with each episode seemingly building on the mythology developed during the tail end of the first season and the futuristic unaired first season episode “Epitaph One”.  It’s only fitting that after the previous two episodes where the gang took on Rossum in an attempt to destroy the technology that we get another Epitaph episode which picks up soon after the original story.  The three survivors from “Epitaph One” are making their way to Safehaven under the guidance of Caroline in the little girls body.  They’re soon apprehended and taken as bodies for Rossum execs Harding (Adelle’s one-time successor originally played by Keith Carradine) and Ambrose (previously seen in “Echoes”, “Meet Jane Doe” and “Getting Closer”).  Echo and Ballard have already infiltrated the complex in order to rescue Topher who’s being used to develop advanced tech for Rossum.  In his disturbed state Topher says that he can return the world to how it was and restore all the people affected by wipes to their original selves.  All he needs is access to the Dollhouse back in LA.  The whole gang go back to LA and find Alpha protecting dolls in the Dollhouse.  Topher’s tech is to be shot into the stratosphere and this will allow it to dissipate across the globe.  However, because Echo, Priya and Victor don’t want to go back to their original selves they must stay underground in the Dollhouse for the next year whilst the radiation (?) from the bomb fades.

Whew, as you can see a lot of stuff is crammed into this final episode in order to give a proper sense of closure to the Dollhouse story.  It does feel a little rushed at times, but because “Epitaph Two” is set ten years in the future it allows the writers to present circumstances that fit storywise without the need for exposition detailing how the circumstances have changed so dramatically for the characters.  For example, Priya’s and Victor’s breakup is presented as stemming from a choice Victor had to make between her and the tech without any flashback to illustrate this, and Alpha is now a somewhat balanced person I assume because of him taking on Ballard’s personality in a previous episode, but this is not alluded to in any fashion.

Just like “Epitaph One” it takes a little while to adjust to the future setting with ten years of history gone by, new characters, old characters in new bodies, and new goals, but once this is done it becomes as engaging as ever.  And although this episode ends on a slightly more uplifting and hopeful note, it’s just as bleak as “Epitaph One”.  But you know what, I really like the tone of the show in these last few episodes and especially both of the Epitaph ones.  Not everything has to be peaches and cream.  The characters are going against the odds, they are dealing with dangerous technology, and that technology does raise both moral and philosophical questions about what it means to be human.  If this type of story was told any other way I’d be sorely disappointed.  Thankfully Whedon and company understood this and we all got a great finale for a show which grew stronger and stronger as it went along.  In fact, as finales to Joss Whedon shows go I may rank this higher than both Buffy and Angel.  I’m not saying that Dollhouse is a better show than either Buffy or Angel, but I do think that it had the most fitting sendoff of the three.  Dollhouse didn’t start out very well with the constant imprint-of-the-week episodes, but once it got rolling and the scope of the story was revealed it was an absolute pleasure to watch.  I’m hopeful that Joss Whedon will return with something new soon and that he’ll be given longer than 26 episodes to tell the story he wants.

FINAL RATING: 8/10

A weekly post that will be going up on Saturday or Sunday with the purpose of highlighting the shows I watched that week and how I ranked them.  It’s not intended as a list of all shows on the air, only those that I actually watched during the week.  Watching something on Monday that aired on Friday won’t make the cut.

Like everything on this site it’s for my own enjoyment but feel free to comment.

1. Dollhouse 2×01 – A great season premiere which continues to build on the momentum that the show created through the second half of the shows first season.  Amy Acker had some great stuff before she sets sail to her new show.  I hope it fails so she comes back.  Fran Kranz (Topher) was great again with some nice dramatic work that sits nicely with his performance in Epitaph One.  I also liked how Paul was integrated into the Dollhouse and the introduction of Alexis Denisof’s character.  Hopefully Joss Whedon has big plans for Denisof cos the more Buffy alums the better.  8.5/10
2. Bored to Death 1×01 – I went to NYC about four weeks ago and fell in love with the city instantly.  Watching Bored to Death (which is set in Brooklyn) reminds me of being there and it’s a great feeling.  Zach Galafianakis is fantastic so his presence is very welcome.  Ted Danson is another story but I’m confident that I’ll like him.  7.5/10
3. How I Met Your Mother 5×01 – A nice solid season premiere which set the stage for the development of the relationship between Barney and Robin.  Other than that it was nothing special but not particularly poor either.  7/10
4. Flashforward 1×01 – I definitely don’t think this is gonna amount to a suitable Lost replacement, but the pilot certainly raises some interesting directions that the show could go in.  I don’t buy John Cho as an action guy (he’ll always be Harold to me) but I am glad to see in him a show which ABC seems to have a lot invested in.  6.5/10
5. Fringe 2×02 – Another disappointing episode.  This one seeming even more like a rehash of something from the first season or perhaps The X-Files.  I’m not a fan of monster-of-the-week episodes.  6/10
6. Survivor 19×02 – Russell keeps getting better and better.  This week he orchestrated the voting off of another perceived enemy and he found the immunity idol at his camp with no clues whatsoever.  Very impressive.  6/10
7. Heroes 4×01/4×02 – Surprisingly it was pretty decent.  I still hate Parkman, Claire and Nathan but for some reason I didn’t hate the episode.  Looks like it survives another week on my viewing schedule, but then again I’ve been saying for two years that I’m never watching it again and I always seem to come back.  5.5/10
8. The Emmys – Tina Fey should have won best comedy actress, Neil Patrick Harris should have got best supporting comedy actor, and Lost should have got best drama.  Aside from that it was a good show.  Harris was a great host.  6/10
9. Modern Family 1×01 – I’m not sure what the fuss about this one is.  I really didn’t find it that funny.  In fact, the only positive I could take away from the show is the presence of Ed O’Neill and Julie Bowen.  5/10

Once again I didn’t have time to watch The Office but I also missed out on Community, Parks & Recreation, The Forgotten and Curb Your Enthusiasm.  Hopefully next week I’ll be able to find time to watch these shows and others.

Written by: Diablo Cody
Directed by: Karyn Kusama
Genre: Comedy, horror, parody

Jennifer (Megan Fox) convinces her best friend Needy (Amanda Seyfried) to come see a rock band at their local bar.  After a fire rips through the bar the band take Jennifer into the woods and sacrifice her to Satan in order to become famous.  The sacrifice goes wrong and Jennifer becomes inhabited by a demon and in order to stay strong Jennifer feeds on the boys in her high school.  Needy is the only one who suspects anything and sets about stopping her.

I know, it doesn’t sound that great, and depending how you feel about Diablo Cody and Megan Fox this may in fact be a movie you couldn’t be paid to watch.  I on the other hand have been looking forward to Jennifer’s Body for quite some time now.  I’m a big fan of both Megan Fox and Diablo Cody but it wasn’t just the involvement of these two which made me keep an eye on Jennifer’s Body.  Truth be told I’m an even bigger fan of the supporting cast who include Amanda Seyfried (Veronica Mars), Adam Brody (The O.C.), Chris Pratt (Everwood, Parks & Recreation), the criminally underappreciated Kyle Gallner (Veronica Mars), J.K. Simmons and Amy Sedaris.

I dare say the main reason people will either dislike, or not see, Jennifer’s Body is because it’s written by Diablo Cody.  I think the main complaint about Diablo Cody is she tries too hard to make her dialogue creative and the vast majority of the time it’s a little too cute for it’s own good.  The fact is that people don’t speak like the characters she writes, and whilst this is kinda the appeal of Diablo Cody for me, I can understand why people are turned off by her work.  Whilst I’m not turned off by her work I do notice it, and sometimes it stretches even a little further than I’d like and it’s at this point that I’m taken out of the film.  I’d say on balance there are more instances like this in Jennifer’s Body than Juno, but on the whole even these instances don’t ruin the film for me, they just act as a minor distraction.  And in all honesty I’m not really sure why such vitriol has been directed towards Diablo Cody.  Maybe those who don’t like her work or begrudge her success should simply not watch her films.  That seems like a far more sensible thing to do than cover the internet in venom filled comments.

The great thing about Jennifer’s Body is that it doesn’t take itself too seriously and I really don’t think that it should be classified as a horror.  In fact, I’m not even sure if should be classified as a comedy either because if anything it’s a hybrid of horror, comedy and parody.  That might not be something that gets people into the cinema but it’s the closest approximation of what the film is.  A prime example is the lesbian kissing scene.  It was done almost as a wink to the audience and a nod to it’s 80′s horror movie roots.  Everyone (at least all the guys) want Jennifer and Needy to kiss, so Diablo Cody was good enough to write it.  It doesn’t really shape the story in any way, other than maybe highlighting the connection between Jennifer and Needy, but it’s another nod to the 80′s horror pedigree that it’s mocking/honouring.

Final mention should be made of the awesome Amanda Seyfried.  Whilst she may not be doing the talk show rounds like Megan Fox she’s just as important a part of the film as anyone.  Although she’s an absolute knockout she’s really dressed down in the film but still manages to be a beautiful captivating presence.  As weird as it sounds, those eyes of hers are mesmerizing.  I think I could probably watch a movie that just involved her staring at the screen for 90 minutes.  I realise that’s an odd thing to say but it’s probably at least 60% true.  That’s how much I love her.

RATING: 7/10

CONCLUSION
The special effects are average (but still vastly superior to Twilight), the story is nothing special, the dialogue is too cute for its own good at times, the twist ending (although I don’t actually think it’s meant to be a “twist ending”) is nothing special, it’s not particularly scary, and it’s not particularly funny.  But you know what, none of that matters to me.  The draw of Jennifer’s Body is the actors.  That’s pretty much it.  I love everyone in the film and the absolute main reason I wanted to see the film is because of all the actors in it.  I’m glad it turned out to be exactly as I expected.

Title: “Pilot”
Written by: Adam Reed
Air date: 17th Sept 2009

The show follows the exploits of Sterling Archer, a 007 agent type who works for ISIS, and the various other employees at the organisation.  The pilot, like just about every other pilot, sets up the characters and their individual relationships.

I usually have at least an idea about what’s coming on TV with regards to new shows, but it’s especially true for shows I think I’d be interested in.  I had no idea that Archer was going to be on and I had no clue what it was about.  The only reason I found out about Archer is because I was checking the schedule on TheFutonCritic.com and saw that an animated show was premiering on FX.  As with most new animation, I check the voice cast behind it, and in the case of Archer there’s a pretty decent level of talent, including Judy Greer, Chris Parnell and Jessica Walter.  All this combined to make Archer a show I was very interested in seeing.  My instincts proved right on.

Almost immediately I was struck by how perfect this show felt to me. This one episode taster seems very close to Arrested Development in terms of comedy perfection, with gags that push the limits of not only what an animated show can be but also what a regular show can be. It’s not juvenile or gross-out humour like you’d expect in South Park, but something far more tailored for adults.  The jokes come thick and fast with hardly a break between them.  But don’t think there’s an over-reliance on jokes at the expense of story (eg Family Guy/American Dad/The Cleveland Show) as Archer manages to fit in a decent groundwork for what the show is likely to be about.  Namely espionage, family tension, and sexual relationships.

The whole episode was simply brilliant and trying to highlight just a few parts really does it a disservice.  That being said, some of my favourite parts were:

• “Just the tip.”
• Archer threatening his butler with rubbing sand in his eyes and then ordering the butler to go buy sand.
• “That’s how you get ants.”
• Malory (Archer’s mother) masturbating under her desk whilst having phone sex and having Archer walk in on her.

FINAL RATING: 9/10

CONCLUSION
Checking the FX website reveals that Archer isn’t scheduled to hit the airwaves until January 2010.  I guess the pilot was just to whet our appetites.  It worked.  Archer is one of the best shows I’ve seen in a long time, and is a great adult orientated animated show.  FX is really building a very strong stable of shows.  Waiting until January for Archer is almost as difficult as waiting for Lost, but after seeing the pilot I’m extemely confident that the show will be worth it.